Tomorrow may be too late..... Step 11

We are on day 11 of our happiness series....  Things we need to let go of to be happy....

11. Procrastination

Stop thinking you will finally get to whatever task is at hand tomorrow. Live in the present, and get your sh*t done when it needs to be done. Maximize your time to the best of your ability. Complete each task you need to as soon as you can. This allows you to feel free from worry and stress by getting things out of the way as soon as possible. You also allow yourself more free time to enjoy the things you love.

Who remembers Wimpy from Popeye?

I’ll Gladly Pay You Tuesday for a Hamburger Today

First off, this dude always got on my nerves. I always used to tell my mom, "He ain't gonna paaaay!" lol. And he didn't .  Wimpy was our childhood,...well some of us..childhood lesson on procrastination.  Don't put off to tomorrow what you can do today.

Procrastination is like a credit card: it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.
Christopher Parker 

I am a procrastinator. I like to tell people I work best under pressure.  : / Truth of the matter is, I procrastinate because I am a perfectionist. Well if you are a perfectionist, it means everything has to be perfect right? RIGHT, which means I don't complete things until the last minute, why? Because i want to make sure it's PERFECT. Womp womp womp!  

This picture says it all. Not the only reasons one might procrastinate, but covers most of the bases. You are lazy and put things off until the last minute. You put it off because you are afraid of rejection, or failing. You put it off because you keep amending and modifying it until you have it 'perfect'. The scholars call procrastination 'research' :)

“You may delay, but time will not.” 
― Benjamin Franklin

So, tips on how to manage being a procrastinator..

#7 was a good one for me. Rome wasn't built in a day. The world wasn't formed within a few minutes. I don't have to feel like I have to complete everything all at once, as long as I am moving forward that is progress.  
#4 is also a great tip to implement. We usually put things off when we promise it to ourselves, but if we make it known that we are supposed to take care of something, the task carries a bit more weight. Have your friends check you on it. Notice I said FRIENDS. Don't give that responsibility to just anyone.

"Someday is not a day of the week." ~Author Unknown

TODAY'S CHALLENGE - We sometimes procrastinate because we don't know where to start and everything feels overwhelming. So try this..First thing in the morning, don't get on facebook, don't read your email, don't grab coffee...well maybe do that, but directly after, sit down and write down a list of things you need to do that day. Prioritize them and then work off the list. See how many things you can mark off the list before the day is over. Prioritizing in this manner is like logging your food, for those of you who do this. You never know how much you eat unless you write it down. Same with tasks. You may SEEM busy, but busy doing what? Liking posts on facebook? Reading my blog? lol

'Get er done' - Larry the Cable Guy

Are you my judge?...Day 14

We are on day 14 of our happiness series....  Things we need to let go of to be happy....

Let go of....

14. Judgmental Thoughts

Why do people feel the need to constantly worry about what is going on in other people’s lives? If we spent as much time worrying about our own behaviors as we do worrying about those of others, our lives would be a whole lot more meaningful. You have no idea what is going on in another person’s life, so who are you to pass judgment on the way they act?

“Be curious, not judgmental.” – Walt Whitman

This one is one of my favorites.  I find that I judge people when I am in two situations...I am either JEALOUS of what they have or I am SCARED of doing it myself.
Jealousy we touched on previously right? You see how these all seem to come back around to each other? We don't have, so we downplay someone else's game. Haaaaterz....
Fearful...this one can be interesting. Let's say you have a friend that is trying out a new venture. Financial, physical, mental, whatever, something that is not the usual for them.  Something that takes them out of their comfort zone, but something that could potentially be better for them. They should be fearful, but sometimes, so are we. It may take them away from us. It may really make them a better person, and then what does that mean about me? Maybe this something is something I ALSO need to improve on and I don't want to. So...what do we do? We criticize it. We make it sound stupid. All of a sudden it doesn't make sense....And we're the 'friend'.

Excerpt from Positive Provocations
http://positiveprovocations.com/2012/01/15/how-to-be-non-judgmental-of-yourself-and-others/

Why do we judge others? Isnt it really the easy way out? We much rather judge others than look at our own issues. Its the perfect cover. It makes us feel superior, like as if we were better than them and that temporarily makes us feel good.  Least do we realize, we are only dwelling deeper into the abyss of negativity with this action.

Here is something to chew on...

"Judgment is what we add to discernment when we make a comparison (implicit or explicit) between how things or people are and how we think they ought to be. So, in judgment, there’s an element of dissatisfaction with the way things are and a desire to have things be the way we want them to be."
Tiny Buddha - http://tinybuddha.com/blog/why-judging-people-makes-us-unhappy/

I had to re read this a few times and really marinate on it. ...'we make a comparison between how things or people ARE and how we think they OUGHT to be...'  Now, this is powerful, because the question is, Who tha hell are you? Why is it that you get to decide how things OUGHT to be?? JUDGEMENT is you pushing your predetermined thoughts and standards on the world. Oh, excuse me....I forgot who you are. : /

Excerpt http://www.3ho.org/3ho-lifestyle/healthy-happy-holy-lifestyle/happy/five-ways-get-rid-judgment-meditation-inner

5 WAYS TO GET RID OF JUDGEMENT

1. Don’t Assume You Know Someone’s Story

Often we project our own self-judgments onto others. For example if someone does not seem to be working as hard as everyone else we assume that person is lazy, lesser than and not deserving of our respect.  We cannot know another person’s unique experience – it is impossible.  Best to take your particular judgment and bring it back to yourself because it is really only about you. In the above example, that person’s ego is identified with being ‘a hard worker’ and will value himself only when they work.

2. Let Life Come to You

In the Aquarian Age, we are shifting our reliance on Time and Space – in the Piscean Age we had to go out and get what we needed.  Now what we need comes to us through magnetic frequency. Have you noticed when you stick to this old way of doing life – that you become exhausted and nothing works anyway? This new way of being is very upsetting to  the mind and you will hear a tirade of panicky judgmental thoughts with the sole purpose of  keeping you under its control. This is part of the process of the changeover.  Trust that your magnetic frequency is bringing everything you need even as you read this.

2. Do Not Believe What You Think

The mind is like a computer – it is constantly measuring and comparing –   it works with contrasts – this or that.  You are not your mind – you are the eternal witness of your mind. Do not identify and attach to thoughts, opinions and the ego’s need to be right.  In fact those thoughts and opinions may not even be yours – inherited from your ancestors or you may be just picking up other free floating thoughts from your co-workers, neighbors – strangers on the street.

3. Stop Should-ing all over yourself

Judgment’s power word is should. Go deeper to explore your unique should -  it often means you are seeking approval from an outside source such as a parent, authority figure or your community.  Start to seek approval only from your higher consciousness. This is your Life –  it is time to stop living someone else’s dream and trying to please everyone.

5. The Secret Antidote to Judgment

The secret antidote for judgment is acceptance. This is 100% acceptance of yourself and where you are in your life in this moment.  When you bring this kind of acceptance to yourself – it will raise the vibrational frequency around you.  If you fully embrace this moment in time, you will notice that you have everything you need.   When you completely accept yourself, you won’t have to try and effort to accept others – you will naturally be accepting of others.

TODAY'S CHALLENGE - Let's walk around today without passing judgement on anyone..Remember, acceptance is the key. Just strangers not even people we know. It's Sunday and a church day for some of you....lol..PERFECT.

“People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves.” 
― Albert Camus, The Fall

What you say you are, you will be..Step 16

We are on day 16 of our happiness series....  Things we need to let go of to be happy....

Let go of...

16. Insecurity

Happy people tend to have extremely high levels of self-esteem. They accept who they are and work at it everyday of their lives. They radiate confidence, flaunt their pride and give off positive vibes. There is no reason to be insecure in life. If there are things you are self-conscious about, go out into the world and seek to change them. Only you have the ability to create the best version of yourself.

What we have to realize is that we tend to have insecurities about things WE manifest and nurture in our minds and eventually in our physical. We sometimes like to blame our insecurites and self esteem issues on other people, and although some people may mention things or do things that may initiate certain thoughts within us, we decide how we digest and nurture those thoughts. YOU alone decide if you feel fat, ugly, incompetent, worthless, pretty, etc...No one else makes that determination.

I love this quote. I feel it's so true. Take a look at who you spend most of your time meditating on in your mind and who you spend most of your personal time trying to please. Sometimes we are so anxious to please those that aren't happy with who we are, that we 1. miss out on the people who truly matter and really love us, and 2. we continue to dig a deeper and deeper whole reiterating our lack of self worth, and level of who we are.  Other people are quick to point out things that are wrong with others...Ever stop to think that maybe, just maybe, there's nothing wrong with you at all? 

I found this list in an article in the HUFFINGTON Post. http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2013/02/07/boost-your-self-esteem_n_2632824.html

10 Things you can do now to improve your self esteem. It starts with you...Not anyone else. The word says it ..SELF esteem. OTHERS will think of you and treat you the way YOU allow.

1. Stop comparing yourself to others. Trying to live up to or exceed someone else’s personal best is a losing game. As the saying goes, “How boring would it be if we were all the same?” Focus on being the best you that you can be.

2. Compliment yourself regularly, either by looking in the mirror and saying something you like about yourself or writing it in a journal. Many times, we’re quick to compliment others on their success but hesitate to do the same for ourselves.

3. Exercise consistently, at least 30 minutes of exercise several times a week, to strengthen muscles and to burn calories. Improve your physical strength, and you may feel a sense of empowerment that can dramatically enhance your self-esteem.

4. Simply smile. The mere act of smiling changes blood flow to the brain and can actually makes you feel happier and relieve tension. A smile sets off chemical and physical reactions within your mind and body, releasing endorphins that boost your mood.

5. Focus on your accomplishments. Forgive yourself for mistakes and focus on the positive by celebrating your victories. Consider writing them down so you can review and reflect when you’re feeling down and need to renew your confidence.

6. Get the support you need to succeed. Join a weight-loss support group, like TOPS, which can help you to stay on track to accomplish your wellness goals. Fellow members will help keep you motivated.

7. Make a list of your positive qualities. Are you generous? Kind? Write down at least ten positive qualities about yourself and return to this list as often as needed to boost your morale.

8. Find something special in each day. Even if it’s in a small way, do something pleasant and rewarding, like catching up on your favorite television show, taking a walk to the park, or indulging in a bubble bath. Or treat yourself to something small that isn’t a food or beverage, like a manicure or a new piece of costume jewelry.

9. Eat better. Pay attention to your food choices and nourish your body. Buy healthier foods and prepare well-balanced meals that will help give you energy and feel like your best self – not sluggish and overstuffed.

10. Explore a passion. Whether it’s a side job, hobby, or as a volunteer, pursuing your passion in even a small way can lead to a sense of purpose and significantly improve your overall happiness and quality of life.

I am ending with this quote because I LOVE IT. It's so true. Why do we give so much value to other's opinions of us? Why are others the experts ? When and why do we allow that kind of power?

“Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?”― Brigham Young

TODAY's Challenge - I like #7, because clearly, I like lists. Make a list of positive things about yourself, and post it somewhere. Remind yourself daily of the great person you are and the things you contribute to your friends, life and society.